Preaching the Ridiculous Ideas of the Bible

The newest book Turkey Broth for the Spirit: Just a Few Questions presents questions directed at the Pentateuch of Moses.

Read Ester Lighthorse's newest book!
http://www.amazon.com/Turkey-Broth-Spirit-Questions-Pentateuch-ebook/dp/B00GVLQ0CY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1386003781&sr=8-1&keywords=ester+lighthorse


Critical Thinking Demands Honest Review of Religion

Are all of the ideas and edicts and stories and similes and metaphors of the Bible wrong? Is there anything of value to be found within the Bible itself (I do not mean Christianity but the Bible itself)? Are there ridiculous claims, statements, and rules in the Bible that are either harmful or make no sense?

No, not all of what can be found in the Bible is wrong. But before any Christian reading this begins to toot their little horn of religion and hold my statement up as an admission of the Bible's truth, let me make it clear that there is plenty that is wrong and totally fucked up in the Bible. Yes, there are good things in the Bible. Yes, there are many ridiculous statements and claims uttered in the Bible.

Now, I have plenty of blogs discussing the stupidity of religion. What I am talking about is taking a short moment to discuss some good things that are found in the Bible. Here are a few verses:

A verse that immediately pops into mind is I Corinthians 13:4, "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant."

Song of Solomon 8:7 says, "Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away. If one were to give all the wealth of one's house for love, it would be utterly scorned."

Proverbs 15:13 says, "A merry heart is just like medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones."

James 3:18 says, "Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness."

Are there other examples of good things to be found in the Bible? Oh yes. There is no need to list them all here, and the purpose for citing a few verses is to establish that the Bible DOES have SOME good things in it.

Now, I have conversed with many people who try very hard to use the good things in the Bible to validate the stupid or bad crap in the Bible. The most commonly posed question to me is, if I admit that what the Bible has to say about Love is in fact the truth, how can I then turn around and say that the Bible is NOT truth in totality? 

Well, the Bible isn't truth in totality by any means. Here are some examples of what is wrong with some of the claims/teachings/rules that are found in the Bible.

This clip is excellent truth and satire.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NziVdbOTLTI

Listen to to the so-called evidence Strobel cites from the Bible. It makes no goddamn sense. None at all. His 'proof' is found in Jesus claiming to be the Son of God (and remember that not just anybody can claim to be the Son of God) and in the emptiness of Jesus' tomb after Jesus had resurrected, I mean...a body SHOULD be in the tomb in which it was placed, right? But it was EMPTY. Plus, we have WITNESSES who were there at the tomb and who can prove this story; never mind that these witnesses have been dead about two thousand years and thus cannot be reached for comment in regards to Strobel's claim.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37vZGS_F5yc

This guy does a pretty good job of conveying how Christianity/Bible-based faiths are founded on some of the most terrible things/situations. He talks about the recent television program called "The Bible" and breaks down the presented material from that show into a hilarious explanation of its errors.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7ND_i-aHxg

This is absolutely outstanding in its assertion that Christianity has brainwashed youth.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7aza7SktV0

Hell, no. There should not be prayer in ANY political setting. There is a lady in this clip who says that prayer should stay and that if people are bothered by it they should just shut their mouth for a few minutes out of respect for those who believe in and love God. Interesting. She does not seem to have any clue whatsoever that those who do not believe in God and who do not want to pray also have rights. You want to pray before a political meeting, fine. Meet somewhere with your pals beforehand and pray then; why don't you show respect for those who do not wish to be part of your delusion OR your apparent desire to have your faith affect matters of government.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UG7ZCHTqavI

Many people who are Christian are in fact stupid and delusional by virtue of believing their faith to be  THE truth no matter how much science can explain using logic, and no matter how Christianity and the Bible are completely devoid of what truth and proof are. And since when did the number of people believing the horseshit of the Bible lend any kind of credibility to the same? Christians are confusing mass delusion with ideals of strength in numbers. Epic fail.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdkHBy4ifYU

Exactly.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1JIKOMQV5A

Well, three cheers for spiritual superiority. I always found it interesting that many believers, when ridiculed for their persistent delusions, interpret the ridicule as a sure sign, a validating factor as to the truth of the Bible and as proof of the non-Christians' guilt of sin.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1s5IVdFVQ0

Jesus never existed. Never. Well, maybe he did in the foggy minds of Christians. When you go and try to explain this to a believer one of their most common responses is that Satan and all those who do not believe in the God of the Bible have conspired to remove the proof of Jesus from the pages of history.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTqyocFOMXE

This is excellent!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6LAKleHUr8

Hhhaaaha!!! Hahha! The absurdities of Bible stories and the persistence of people believing in them as actual truth takes stupid to an entirely new level.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUOg5F886xw

Geeze. People WANT this bullshit taught in school. Yikes. Tell you what, if you want your children to believe this poppycock put them in a private school. Other than that, keep this crap out of the public school system. And to you Christians out there in salvation la-la land, stop freaking pretending that your faith is being outlawed or that you are being discriminated against or that your rights are being trampled. It is actually the other way around. 

Christians are the ones stomping on the rights of others. They are so used to being in control for so long that they have come to believe that smothering everyone around them with their rubbish really IS their right. Now, as this control begins slipping the only defense believers have is to claim their rights are being taken away.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tTRn28iZD_g

Exactly! The only reason many non-believers give a damn about what believers believe is that such beliefs often affect the non-believers.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlXkjrluq_4

An all-knowing, all-powerful God would not need help to spread His message.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ttaq39-4yCs


https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/

https://sites.google.com/site/yousillysillygoose/add-a-gallery

https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/theopoly
http://www.zazzle.com/smartytwoshoes
http://www.zazzle.com/biblical_myth_periodic_table_of_elements_posters-228084324809883766
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0090NKCJW#_
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004W0ITIY/ref=r_soa_s_i
http://familytreeofthedivine.blogspot.com/

Joyce Meyer

God Gives Receipts?

     I will say this for Meyer: She has the gifts of gab and the ability to inject just the right amount of humor into whatever it is she is saying. She definitely has charisma which if you really think about it is essential for any successful preacher. Charisma goes a long way in ensuring that the congregation members will stay right where the preacher needs them to stay...in that particular congregation. While Meyer does have immense charisma above and beyond that of a majority of preachers out there in the religious world, she is edged out by pastor Joel Osteen. Osteen's calm demeanor, kind voice and lack of filling his sermons with negative messages of hell put him at the very top of the preacher charisma category.
     Moving on to our first video we hear Meyer basically preaching that you should show the devil that you will go the extra mile for God by rounding up to the nearest dollar when paying your tithe. Hah! That is pretty novel. Who wants to be seen as someone who does just the bare minimum, the lowest requirement? The way Meyer puts it you would think that not rounding up or not tithing more than what is required is a sign of an obstinate and stingy believer. What a crock of shit, Meyer. And you preach with that mouth?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DXbcQfcIXX8

     Here we go again with religious people attacking other religious people who are popular. Joyce Meyer is amazingly popular and much like Joel Osteen and Kenneth Copeland who also have amazingly large followings she is picked at by others within the faith. I bet many of those doing the picking are just green with envy at the amount of money that many of the preachers they speak out against make on a consistent basis. This envy is hidden in, disguised as faithful followers of Christ simply trying to disrobe those clothed in the garb of a false prophet. The funny thing is...ALL of them are full of it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MQUDGzg9Cro

    Jesus Christ in a chariot driven sidecar...every preacher of every religion in every denomination have asserted at some point or other that THEY have been called by God. The crux of her message is if you continue to tithe you will be taken care of by God. You may not get the new clothes or the new car or the new house, but by Jesus and Mary, God will make sure what you have will last. Any doubts that you have about tithing is just the devil come to try to peel you away from the faith and the law of giving. This is a test. This is only a test of the spiritual broadcast system. Had this been anything other than a test it isn't God but the devil. Don't forget to sign your name on the check and for whatever amount you put down Jesus is commanding you to add two zeroes. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZLgEBTaiuY

     This is a delicious hoot! Of course you know as well as I that while a preacher may be silver-tongued and quite convincing, it is the individual who believes that horseshit who must shoulder some of the blame. It is the person who allows themself to believe such poppycock who is, in the final analysis, responsible for their condition of spiritual slavery.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNvENZShmyo

     Holy shit! I am in the wrong business! A ten thousand square foot home? Homes for the kids? All bills paid by the ministry? Oh man, no wonder why so many people become preachers. They are swimming in cash! I suppose it really does not matter how many people speak out against these folks because in the end there are always the spiritually inept in the world who are all too willing to give their money to these phonies.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ko5zkkZ0GmQ

     This is interesting. I grew up steeped in the Christian faith and what Meyer is preaching here is totally otra de la Biblia. Of course, the way the Bible is written you can put just about ANY MEANING YOU WANT to anything that is written in the Bible. That is the terrible beauty of religion. You can change it to fit the people and the times and even make it fit the politics. Three cheers for religion...rah rah rah!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrP3OLCH9GI

     This is so goddamn jacked up. Since when did receiving equate with receipting? What the hell kind of bullshit is this? Since when do people do good things with the belief or intent that somewhere down the line when they need something they can 'cash in' whatever it is they have done in their lives to get what they need? If that isn't some fucked up and severely twisted doctrine I don't know what is. When you do something good you do it for the sake of being good and not for the purpose of receiving something back.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1fxtnyBuNQ


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http://toleratingaggressivereligioushumor.blogspot.com/

http://realbookofrevelation.blogspot.com/

http://realbookofrevelation.blogspot.com/

http://makinggodangry.blogspot.com/

http://www.zazzle.com/biblical_myth_periodic_table_of_elements_posters-228084324809883766

http://www.zazzle.com/funny_quotes_poster_1-228598465831373233

http://www.amazon.com/Turkey-Broth-Spirit-Theologians-ebook/dp/B004LX0IOK/ref=sr_1_3?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1308702224&sr=1-3

Kenneth Copeland

I Smell a Rat

     It seems like this guy has been on religious television forever. He is one of the wealthiest television preachers, in part due to concocting ridiculous stories like the one he tells here in an effort to disarm the many sheep in the audience. That way the audience members won't think twice about writing this worm a check or giving him cash when he asks them for their money.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luh30BiCUlI

     Copeland is very creative when finding ways to validate his prosperity doctrine. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6gWdJA48K4

     Give money to me. If you give money to me I promise that God will bless you immensely.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCVyIbG4nrQ&list=PL97226299D64BD0A1

     You know, you have serious investigations like this one that are aired on major networks. The information is compelling, yet these liars and thieves still continue to rake in the cash. Why are people still giving to them? Do these people ever watch these types of shows? Do they even care that they are being taken for a ride?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7b5m824hwJk

     Granted, I am not a Christian. I was, however, raised Christian and am very familiar with the doctrines and rules and such. Now, we were taught that you do not need anyone to go to God for you on your behalf. Never. You yourself speak directly to God through prayer. That is really a key stone in the foundation of Christianity, that the believer goes before Christ themselves through prayer.
     And of course you know why Copeland has a freaking prayer line, right? Why pass up the chance to squeeze as much as possible from the believers? Create a prayer line, and when they call in offer them the newest DVD or promotional item that Jesus really wants them to have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1kEKTVaxZY

     This is rather interesting. This was the first time I ever heard a sermon on how God is the biggest failure in the Bible. I had to listen to it several times. You know what I realized? Copeland is right. The God presented in the Bible is definitely the greatest failure in the Bible. He is the one with the greatest amount of power, omnipotence, authority, and who consistently fucks things up for everyone, including His chosen people.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rHvdk_cBzg

     Well, here we have actual proof that believers get drunk on the blood of Christ. I always wondered why so many people attended communion services. This show of entirely fabricated...shit, I don't even know what to call it...this is pathetic. Simply fucking pathetic. Do you feel sorry for the people getting rooked when they make the choice to believe this bullshit?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SgByE0pX1M

     Hubba-dubba-yabba-dabba? What the hell does he say at the beginning? He is supposed to be speaking in tongues. If he is speaking in tongues then the believing folks in the audience are listening with stupidity.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xj6lbWSU3rk


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http://cantstandreligion.blogspot.com/

https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/theopoly

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https://sites.google.com/site/yousillysillygoose/home

Dayna Muldoon

Curse Me Kilts it's Another Lying Thief!

     It has been a while, a least since Tammy Faye Baker, that we have seen such a morbidly fascinating female preacher such as Dayna Muldoon. If I were Dayna Muldoon (which praise God I am not) I would get some acting lessons or something.

     Oh my dear sweet Jesus. This woman cannot sing for shit, or rap, or whatever it is she is trying to do. A miserable fail in its entirety. Her campy, made-up lyrics only make things worse. If it were not for the fact that she is a shyster preacher I would say for her not to quit her day job, cause she sure as hell can't make it in music.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHSE60vojr0

     Listen to what this spiritual hooker is saying and how she is saying it. Her vocal inflections are completely lacking in anything remotely genuine. In some ways she sounds like an educated person trying desperately to sound like the poor broke people from the hood. What do you know, a spiritual version of Vanilla Ice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WD1XCava-gk

     Where did pastor Dayna find this guy? Wherever she found him I think he is a stand in and the original guy chickened out. Look at the guys sleeves...they are rolled, and not just a little bit. And what the hell is she talking about some "band" being cut and broken? Is she referring to the stomach band put in to prevent eating too much? 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQM5a_WgMSE

     This woman's lack of melodious talent is deliciously hilarious! She needs to fire her song writer, or if she does not have one she should hire one because she herself is totally failing in her own efforts. Someone needs to tell her she is NOT Whitney Huston or the gospel singing Wynans. If her God heals she should request He heal her busted ass singing voice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ra0e5MDaFXw

     This is SO amazing! I absolutely LOVE IT! This priestess of the False-High God is pushed from her high horse as another preacher exposes her in front of everyone. Watch her reaction as it is rather interesting. It really takes her several moments to really get the clue that her ass has been punked.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fx0x15QC2ds

     This man is trying to ask the attendees of one of pastor Dayna's gathering what they think of her claims of healing and all that fun mumbo-jumbo. They seem fairly willing to answer and respond to his inquiries, but then some douche who is very likely working for Muldoon arrives on the scene and tries to break up the party. If Muldoon was so truthful and truly blessed by the powers of God, why didn't the staff let the questioning man in and prove to him they were not the charlatans they unfortunately appear to be?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAWhetKyio0


https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/theopoly

https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/what-are-religious-cults

https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/deluge-of-disparity-and-debauchery-in-christian-faiths

https://sites.google.com/site/esterlighthorse/customization

http://realbookofrevelation.blogspot.com/

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